We’re down to the last couple of cigarettes in the noxious 85% tar pack of 2025. What shall we light them with? A Brat-green Clipper from last year that we just found behind the sofa? A £50 ...

A couple of things we need to get through before we wade in with our knockoff Hunters that we got ...

St Valentine may have packed up his giant helium balloons, petrol station flowers, grotesque life-size teddy bears with matted plush, and cheap massage oil, but your favourite romantic dynamic duo – ...

Time was, I would review this Blind Date column every week, but nowadays it’s very rare for me to do two weeks in a row. Time gets away from me, my brain doesn’t work on Saturday mornings any more, I ...

In these serious times, there is a feeling of guilt attached to frivolity. A sense, perhaps, that you’re playing MarioKart while Rome frazzles. Political intrigue has rendered showbiz gossip ...

Summer loving happened so fast according to Travolta, J and Newton-John, O, but how quickly will love blossom between Max, 25, a chef, and Kajol, also 25, and a doctor. Two professions straight out of ...

I am obsessed by the Guardian’s incredible Blind Date column, which I pretend I loathe but obviously I love it. Aren’t you? Don’t you? Why ever not? Anyway, for reasons nobody can quite understand, I ...

What happened on the date Shockingly, the “table manners” question was NOT asked. It’s a cover-up! Imagine how bad the answer must’ve been for them to leave it out. Or the journo forgot. The date was ...

My debut novel came out in 2018. THE LAST ROMEO (lesson 1 in being an author is you must only ever write your book title in CAPS – I have no idea why) was published by Little, Brown and I am VERY ...

A couple of things we need to get through before we wade in with our knockoff Hunters that we got from the car boot sale from the man who has L-V-O-E tattooed on his left knuckles: THE GLORIOUS DEAD ...

Fate has thrown together in the Guardian Blind Date blender of doom Imelda, 56, a local authority officer, and Jayesh, 66, who works in medical devices. Two jobs I want to know absolutely nothing more ...